Chapter 3

Due to the infamous bunny girl incident, Asahina has become a household name as well in the school. After taking a day off, she once again boldly appeared in the club room.

As there hadn't been any decent club activities yet, I brought an Othello board, which had been buried deep in my home, long forgotten, and played some games with Asahina while chatting with her.

The website is done, but it was as good as useless as there were no visitors, nor a single email. The computer was only good for surfing the internet. If the guys from the Computer Study Group ever found out, they'd cry themselves to death.

Sitting next to Nagato Yuki, who as usual is reading her book, I started the third round of Othello with Asahina.

"Suzumiya-san sure is taking her time." Asahina said softly while still staring at the board.

Seeing that she's not affected by what's happened before, I breathed a sigh of relief. No matter what, to be able to be in the same room with a cute girl who's one year your senior is enough to make one giddy.

"There's a transfer student coming in today, I bet she went to look for him."

"Transfer student?"

Asahina raised her head like a little bird.

"Haruhi was excited when she heard that there's a transfer student in Class 1-9. She really seems to like transfer students!"

I placed a black piece on the board and flipped the white pieces.

"Uh huh..."

"Oh yeah, Asahina-san, I never thought you'd come today!"

"Um... I did hesitate for a while, but I was a bit concerned, so in the end I came."

Where've I heard you say that before?

"What are you concerned about?"

Smack! She flipped one of the board pieces with her tiny fingers.

"Um... nothing."

I turned around and noticed Nagato staring at the board. Her face is static like a clay doll, but under her glasses, her eyes showed a glare never seen before.

"..."

Her glare was like a new born kitten amazed at seeing a dog for the first time. I traced her vision towards my hand which was holding the board piece.

"... Nagato-san, you wanna play?"

After I said that, Nagato robotically blinked her eyes and, in a very minuscule way that you wouldn't have noticed unless you paid very close attention, lightly nodded her head. So I swapped seats with Nagato and sat besides Asahina.

Nagato picked up one of the pieces and studied it intensely. When she discovered the pieces would stick together because they were magnetic, she recoiled her hands as if she were frightened.

"Nagato-san, have you played Othello before?"

She slowly swung her head.

"Do you know the rules then?"

The answer was negative.

"Well see here, as you're holding black, your objective is to surround the white pieces with your black pieces. And then you flip the surrounded white pieces over and they become black. In the end, whoever has more pieces wins."

She nodded her head. Afterwards, she elegantly placed the pieces on the board, though she was kind of clumsy in flipping the opponent's pieces.

After the opponent was changed, Asahina started to appear more anxious. I noticed Asahina's fingers started to tremble, and she wouldn't dare lift her head to look at Nagato. She would occasionally take a peek at Nagato and then look away quickly, which she did many times. In the end maybe Asahina couldn't really concentrate, so black quickly took a clear advantage in the game.

How come? Asahina seems to be very wary of Nagato, I just don't understand why.

It wasn't long before black won convincingly. Just as the two were to begin another round, the perpetrator responsible for all the chaos returned with a new sacrifice.

"Hiya, kept ya waiting!"

Haruhi greeted us casually while pulling the sleeve of a male student.

"This is today's new transfer student in First Year Ninth Class, his name is..."

Haruhi suddenly stopped and gave a "it's your cue" look. The sacrifice turned and smiled at us.

"... Koizumi Itsuki, pleased to meet you."

A skinny figure, he gives an impression of an energetic young man. A very contented smile, kind eyes, and a handsome face. If he should make a pose as a model on those supermarket flyers, he'll definitely get a lot of fans. If he's a nice guy, he'll be even more popular.

"This is the SOS Brigade club room. I'm the commander, Suzumiya Haruhi. These here are Subordinates One, Two, and Three. Oh and, you're Number Four, remember to get along well!"

What kind of introduction is that!? The only names mentioned are yours and his only!

"I don't mind joining!"

Koizumi, the transfer student, smiled kindly:

"So what kind of club is this?"

If there were a hundred people here, they'd certainly ask the same question. A lot of people had come to ask me this question, but I could never find the answer for that. If a person can answer that skillfully, then he's a talented con artist! Haruhi doesn't seem concerned, however, and smiled cheerfully at us and said:

"Then let me tell you what the SOS Brigade is about, that is..."

Haruhi slowly breathed in, and then dramatically revealed the shocking truth.

"To find aliens, time travelers and espers, and befriend them!"

The whole world's time seems to have stopped at this moment.

That's a bit of a ridiculous statement. The only thing in my mind was "Just as I thought." But the other three didn't think so.

Asahina was completely dumbfounded, widening her eyes and ears and stared at the cheery looking Haruhi. Nagato Yuki was the same, after turning her head towards Haruhi, she stopped as if she'd ran out of batteries. What surprised me was that Nagato's eyes widened a little bit. For someone who doesn't show a lot of expression, that is a surprising reaction.

As for Koizumi, he gave a somewhat enigmatic smile; it was hard to know what the smile meant. A moment later, Koizumi was the first to get back to his senses.

"Ah, I see."

As if he understood something, he looked at Asahina and Nagato, and nodded in comprehension.

"As expected from Suzumiya-san."

After making this ambiguous comment, he continued:

"No problem, I'll join. I look forward to working with you guys."

He smiled showing his bright, white teeth.

Hey! Did you just accept her explanation just like that? Did you really even listen?

Noticing a confused-looking me, Koizumi suddenly came and stretched his hand towards me.

"I'm Koizumi. As I just transferred today, there's still a lot for me to learn. Nice to meet you."

I shook the polite Koizumi's hand.

"Sure, I'm..."

"He's Kyon!"

Haruhi introduced me on her own accord, and then pointed to the other two: "The cute one there is Mikuru-chan, and the four-eyed one is Yuki-san."

Crash!

A loud noise thundered. It was Asahina who tripped over her chair as she was trying to get up, and landed her forehead on the Othello board.

"Are you all right?"

Hearing Koizumi's voice, Asahina reacted by turning her head, doll-like, and looking up at the exchange student radiantly. Hmph! That's pretty annoying, that look.

"... I... I'm fine." Asahina said in a very small tone, looking shyly at Koizumi.

"Great, now we have five members! The school won't be able to do anything about it!"

Haruhi continued:

"Right, the SOS Brigade is open for business! Everyone, let us work together and move forward!"

What do you mean open for business, missy?

When I noticed, Nagato had already gone back to her seat reading her hardcover book. Nagato-san, Haruhi has already counted you as a member, are you sure you're OK with that?

After Haruhi said she wanted to take Koizumi for a tour of the school and left, Asahina also said she had things to do at home, so only Nagato and I remained behind.

I wasn't in the mood to play Othello, and there's not much fun watching Nagato read, so I decided to go home as well. I picked up my bag and bid my farewell to Nagato.

"I'll be going then!"

"Have you read the book?"

Hearing her say that, I stopped in my footsteps. Turning around, I noticed Nagato Yuki looking at me with her near expressionless eyes.

"What book? Oh, you mean the thick hardback one you lent me the other day?"

"Yes."

"Oh, I haven't read that... Maybe I should return it to you?"

"There's no need to."

Nagato never minces her words, she always gets straight to the point in one short sentence.

"Remember to read it today."

Nagato said flatly.

"As soon as you get home."

Her voice has a tone of command to it.

Besides those required by Literature classes, I rarely touch novels, but since Nagato recommended it, it should be quite interesting.

"... All right already!"

Hearing my response, Nagato went back to reading her book.

Which is why, I found myself pedaling my bike as hard as I could in the darkness.

I returned home after saying goodbye to Nagato and went straight to my room after dinner to start reading the foreign science fiction novel she shoved to me. Just when I was getting dizzy with the sea of packed words, I decided to flip through the book wondering if I could ever finish reading this, and a bookmark fell from the book and onto the carpet.

It was a strange looking bookmark with flower patterns printed on it. I flipped it around and found a line of words written.

Seven o'clock tonight, waiting for you at the park outside the station.

The words are so neat, as though as it has been written by a word processor. This plain looking handwriting does look like Nagato's, though I'm not certain.

I've had this book for days now. So is the seven o'clock written for seven o'clock that night? Or is it seven o'clock for tonight? Could it be that she felt that I would eventually find this bookmark one day and waited in the park every night? Is the reason Nagato wanted me to read the book tonight is so that I would discover this bookmark tonight? Even then, why didn't she just tell me directly? Besides, I don't know why she wanted to call me to the park.

I looked at my watch; the time is just past six forty-five. Even though the station is the nearest one to my school, it would take at least 20 minutes for me to ride my bike there from my place.

I thought about it for about ten seconds.

I stuck the bookmark in my jeans before dashing out of my room and down the stairs like a swift rabbit. I came to the house entrance to see my sister coming out, carrying a popsicle and asking, "Where are you going, Kyon-kun?" I answered "The station." hopped on my bike, which was tied by the door, and rode off to my destination.

If Nagato isn't there, I think I'm going to laugh very loud at myself.

Seems like I won't be able to laugh.

As a careful bicycle rider, it took me till ten past seven to arrive at the park outside the station. As the park was far from the main road, there weren't a lot of people at this time of day.

Under the noises of the trains and cars, I carried my bike and walked into the park. Under the lights of the equally spaced lamp posts ahead, I could faintly see Nagato Yuki's slim figure sitting on one of the long park benches.

She really is the sort of person whose presence is not easily detected. Sitting so quietly in the park, if one didn't know better she could have been mistaken as a ghost!

Nagato slowly stood up like a string puppet.

She's still wearing her uniform.

"Are you glad I finally came?"

She nodded.

"You couldn't have waited here every day?"

She nodded again.

"... Is it something you can't tell me at school?"

Nagato nodded and then walked in front of me.

"This way."

After these two words, she turned and strode forward. Her way of walking is like a ninja: no footsteps can be heard at all. I could only reluctantly follow behind Nagato, who has blended perfectly with the night.

After a few minutes of walking and watching the breeze blow her hair gently, we arrived at a apartment block very near the station.

"Right here."

Nagato took out her pass and brushed it once against the electronic sensor at the entrance; the glass door ahead of us opened. I left my bicycle by the entrance and followed closely behind Nagato, who was already headed to the elevator. Inside the elevator, Nagato seemed to have something in mind but said nothing, only staring at the floor number board. Finally, the elevator arrived at the seventh floor.

"Excuse me, but where are we going?"

It was late, but I had to ask. Nagato, who was walking slowly along the corridor, replied:

"My home."

I stopped at once. Wait a minute! Why is Nagato taking me to her home?

"Don't worry, there's no one else inside."

Wait, what's that supposed to mean?

Nagato opened the door to room 708, and then turned to face me.

"Enter."

Are you serious?

I tried to stay calm and entered with trepidation. As I took off my shoes, Nagato pushed the door shut.

I had a feeling of having just boarded a pirate ship, and I apprehensively turned around at the ominous sound of the door closing.

"Come in."

Nagato said that flatly and took off her shoes as well. If the apartment had been dark, I could still have escaped. Alas, it was brightly illuminated, making the wide apartment look even wider.

I guess this must be one of those posh condominiums. To be so near the station, the price had to be very expensive.

But why does it look as if no one has lived in here?

Besides the living room, which had a small table with a warm blanket, there was nothing else. There were no curtains on the windows, and no carpet laid over the ten tatami-sized wooden floor tiles.

"Sit down."

Nagato said before entering the kitchen, so I knelt down beside the living room table.

The reasons a girl might have to invite a boy home while her parents were away from the house were going through my head, when Nagato, moving like a mechanical puppet, placed a tray with a small teapot and teacups on the table and sat down demurely in her school uniform, across from me.

After that, the unbearable silence.

She didn't even pour tea for me, just sat there looking at me expressionlessly. Seeing this, I felt more and more uneasy.

"Erm... where's your family?"

"There isn't any."

"Well, I see they're not at home... have they gone out?"

"I've always been the only one here since the beginning."

This is the first time I heard Nagato use such a long sentence.

"You can't be living on your own, can you?"

"Yes."

Wow, a first year high school girl living alone in a high class apartment! There must be some special reason for this, right? I breathed a sigh of relief when I learned that I didn't have to meet Nagato's parents. Wait a moment! This is not the time to be relieved!

"Oh right, what is it you want to see me for?"

As if remembering something, Nagato began pouring the tea into a cup and pushed it over to me.

"Drink."

I obligingly started drinking the cup of tea. All this time, Nagato watched me like observing a giraffe in a zoo, so I couldn't concentrate on drinking.

Is it good?"

This is the first time I hear her ask a question.

"Yeah..."

After I finished, I placed the cup on the table, and Nagato refilled it instantly for me. Since she's refilled it, I might as well drink that. Once I completed, she refilled a third cup for me. Finally, the tea pot is empty. Nagato stood up about to refill the teapot. I stopped her at once.

"There's no need to refill tea for me anymore, can you please tell me why you brought me here?"

After I said that, Nagato stopped what she was doing and went back to her sitting position like a video rewinding itself. She still said nothing.

"What is it that can't be said at school?" I asked probingly.

Finally, Nagato moved her thin lips.

"It's about Suzumiya Haruhi."

She straightened her back and sat elegantly.

"And me."

She paused for a while.

I really don't understand her speaking style.

"What is it about Suzumiya and you?"

At this moment, Nagato showed a look of discomfort. This is the first time I've seen her show such an expression ever since I've met her. However, this emotional upheaval of hers is very minuscule; one has to be very observant in order to even notice.

"I cannot completely convey this in words, and there may be errors in the transmission of data. Regardless, listen."

"Suzumiya Haruhi and I are not ordinary humans."

Such an ambiguous sentence so early on in the conversation.

"Well, I more or less realized that already."

"That's not it."

Nagato continued, glancing at her hands lying on her lap.

"I do not mean that in terms of deviations of personality, I mean what I said. She and I are not ordinary human beings like you."

I don't get what she's trying to say.

"The Integrated Data Sentient Entity, which oversees this galaxy, has created a Living Humanoid Interface in order to interact with biological entities - me."

"..."

"My work is to observe Suzumiya Haruhi and upload the data obtained to the Integrated Data Sentient Entity."

"..."

"I have been doing this since I was born three years ago. In the last three years, no particularly unusual elements were discovered, and things were very stable. However, recently an external factor has now appeared beside Suzumiya Haruhi that cannot be ignored."

"..."

"And that is you."

What is the Integrated Data Sentient Entity?

In the vast sea of data known as the universe, there exist many highly sentient data entities that possess no corporeal bodies.

These entities started out in the form of pure data. As all sorts of data gathered together, they became sentient, and finally they evolved by collecting other data.

As they exist only as data and have no corporeal bodies, they cannot be detected even with the most advanced optical devices.

As old as the universe itself, they expanded along with it, and the relative database became ever wider and larger.

Ever since the formation of this planet, sorry, it should be since the formation of this solar system, nothing in this universe is unknown to them. For them, this planet at the edge of the Milky Way is nothing special, because there are numerous planets in the galaxy with sentient organic lifeforms like this one, so numerous that they cannot be counted.

However, as the bipedal lifeform's evolution on the third planet of this solar system became a success, these lifeforms gradually acquired the mental ability to actively seek knowledge. This organic lifeform living on the planet known as Earth started to become important.

"For a long time, we have always believed it impossible for organic lifeforms, who have limited data collection and transmission ability, to be able to acquire knowledge," Nagato Yuki said in a serious tone.

"The Integrated Data Entity is very interested in all forms of organic lifeforms on Earth. It believes that by observation, it can find the solution to its own evolutionary dead end."

Unlike the data entities, who have existed since the beginning in their completed form, humans started off as incomplete organic lifeforms, rapidly evolving by expanding the data that they possessed and using this data, which is saved and enhanced, to further advance themselves.

It is normal for organic lifeforms all over the universe to become sentient, but only the humans on Earth have evolved continuously to a highly sentient level. The Integrated Data Entity was very intrigued by this, and decided to observe these humans further.

"Three years ago, we discovered a very abnormal data hotspot unlike other humans appearing on the surface of this planet. The information sparks emitted from a certain area in the bow-shaped archipelago instantly covered the whole planet and started to spread towards outer space. And the center of all that is Suzumiya Haruhi."

"We do not know why that happened, nor do we know what effects it would have. Even the data entities are unable to fully process the new data being created."

"More importantly, humans are limited in the amount of data that they can process, yet Suzumiya Haruhi was able to create a flare of data on her own."

"The release of massive amounts of data from Suzumiya Haruhi continues to happen, at completely random intervals. Furthermore, Suzumiya Haruhi seems unaware of all this herself."

"For three years, I have gone through all sorts of investigations on the individual known as Suzumiya Haruhi from all perspectives, but up to now I was still unable to discover her true identity. Concurrently, other parts of the Integrated Data Entity have determined that she is the key to the evolution of the data entities and have continued their analysis of Suzumiya Haruhi..."

"As they exist only as entities, they are incapable of speech and are thus unable to interact with organic lifeforms. But without speech, contact with humans would be impossible, hence the Integrated Data Entity has created me to act as the communication bridge between them and humans."

Finally, Nagato picked up her cup and sipped her tea. She has probably said a year's worth of words for her.

"..."

I don't know how to respond.

"The potential for self-induced evolution may lie within Suzumiya Haruhi; she may even hold the ability to control all the data around her. This is why I am here, and that is also why you are here."

My brain is getting so confused, I interrupted:

"I'll be honest, I don't know what on earth you are talking about."

"Please believe me."

Nagato looked at me with a serious expression that I'd never seen before.

"There is a very limited amount of data that can be conveyed through speech. I am just a terminal interface for the data, living as an organic alien in order to interact with humans. I am unable to convey all the thoughts of the Integrated Data Entity to you, so please understand."

Even if you say that, I still don't get it!

"I don't understand, why look to me? Let's say I believe you are an alien created by that whatever-you-call-it entity, but why are you telling me this?"

"Because you have been specifically chosen by Suzumiya Haruhi. Whether she intends to or not, as an Absolute Data Entity, she can influence the environment around her based on her thoughts alone. There must be some reason why you have been chosen."

"No, there isn't!"

"There is. Perhaps for Suzumiya Haruhi, you play an important pivotal role. The endless possibilities are now in the hands of both you and Suzumiya Haruhi."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes."

For the first time, I carefully studied Nagato Yuki's face. I thought she never liked talking, but now that she has opened her floodgates and let her words flow, they were all words that I could not understand. I always felt that she was queer in some way, but after hearing this speech, I discovered her queerness was beyond imagination.

Integrated Data Sentient Entity? Living Humanoid Interface?

Give me a break!

"Okay, I think you should tell this directly to Haruhi, I bet she'd be very delighted. To be frank, I'm not that interested in these topics, sorry about that."

"The majority of the Integrated Data Entity speculates that if Suzumiya Haruhi becomes aware of her own powers and existence, an unforeseen crisis might occur; hence, at this stage we have opted to continue observing."

"There's a chance I'd tell all of this to Haruhi! I really don't get it, why tell me all this?"

"Even if you tell her, it is likely she would ignore it."

It is likely indeed.

"I'm not the only alien placed on Earth by the Integrated Data Sentient Entity. The Entity intends to take a proactive role and observe any changes in the flow of data. For Suzumiya, you are an important person. If there is any sign of a crisis looming, I will look to you first."

Sorry, count me out.

Please excuse me, thanks for the tea, it was nice.

Seeing me about to leave, Nagato didn't stop me.

She lowered her head and glanced at her teacup, reverting back to her normal expressionless mode. I guess it was my imagination, but for some reason, I actually thought she looked kind of lonely.

When my mom asked me where I'd been, I gave a brief reply and went straight to my room. Lying on my bed, I began to recall everything Nagato said.

If I believed what she said, then that would make Nagato Yuki a being that is not of this world; in other words, an alien.

Isn't this exactly the sort of mystical being that Suzumiya Haruhi has been working so hard to look for every day?

And all this time it was all right under our noses.

... Heh... Damn it! I sound like an idiot!

My eye caught the thick hardback novel that was thrown on the corner of the bed. I picked it up with the bookmark and had a glimpse at the cover art before placing it by my pillow.

Nagato must have picked up all those weird fantasies from reading all those science fiction novels all alone in her apartment for so long. She probably never talks to anyone in her class, imprisoning herself in her own mind. She ought to put down her book, get out and make some friends, and enjoy the wonderful school life. Her lack of expression is not helping in getting along with people, and she would look very cute if she'd only smile.

I think I'll return the book to her tomorrow... Forget it, since I've borrowed it, I might as well finish it.

The following day after school.

As I was on duty that day, I arrived at the club room later than usual, and the first thing I saw was Haruhi toying around with Asahina.

"Hold still! Damn it! Be a good girl and don't move!"

"N... nooo! H... help~~"

Haruhi had nearly stripped a struggling Asahina of her uniform.

"KYAA!!!"

Asahina screamed when she noticed me arriving.

The moment I saw Asahina with only her bra and panties on, I immediately turned around and shut the half-opened door.

"Sorry about that."

After waiting outside the door for ten minutes, the duet of Asahina's cute moans and Haruhi's ecstatic exclamations came to an end. Haruhi's voice passed through the door.

"All right, you can come in now."

As I reentered the room, I stopped in astonishment.

There greeting me inside was the sight of a beautiful maid.

Dressed in a maid costume, Asahina sat on the steel chair with tears in her eyes. After sadly looking at me, she lowered her head.

A white apron coupled with a wavy skirt, a blouse, and white stockings only served to make her more adorable. The lacy headband and the large butterfly-knot increased her charm.

Such an impeccable maid!

"Well? Isn't she cute?"

Haruhi said as if praising her own handiwork, while caressing Asahina's hair.

I wholeheartedly agree. No offense to poor Asahina, but she really does look cute in that.

"This costume's great, isn't it?"

"No, it isn't!" Asahina protested softly, yet I pretended I didn't hear her and turned to Haruhi.

"Why are you dressing her up as a maid?"

"Because maid costumes are sexy!"

Stop giving such ambiguous answers!

"It took me a long time to think of this, you know?"

Even if you didn't think at all, it wouldn't make much of a difference.

"In a play where the school is the main stage, there's bound to be an adorable character like Mikuru-chan. In other words, the story won't be able to take off without her, you get it? Mikuru-chan is already gentle and cute, but unless you dress such a cute schoolgirl with a great figure in a maid costume, you won't get people's attention. Now everyone's going to fall in love with her when they see her. With this, we'll be sure of victory!"

Anyway, what is it that you are trying to win, exactly?

As I was thinking of how to respond, Haruhi took out a digital camera out of nowhere and started taking souvenir shots.

Asahina blushed bright red and shook her head violently.

"P... please stop shooting!!!"

Asahina-sempai, you're wasting your time begging for mercy from Haruhi, even if you bow and kneel, because she's the sort who will carry on doing what she's thought out, no matter what.

As expected, Haruhi had Asahina perform all sorts of poses for her photo session.

"Sniff..."

"Now look over here! Lower your chin a bit! Lift up your apron! Yes, that's a good girl! Smile a bit more!"

Haruhi ceaselessly gave out her orders to Asahina while simultaneously pressing down on the camera shutter. If I had asked her where she got this digital camera from, she'd definitely say she'd had it "obtained" somewhere. More like stolen, I guess.

Amidst Haruhi's photo shooting frenzy, Nagato Yuki sat in her seat reading as always. Despite her confusing conversation with me last night, seeing her usual coolness I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Kyon, your turn to shoot."

Haruhi handed the camera to me and turned towards Asahina. Then, like an alligator slowly approaching an unsuspecting bird, she closed her arms around Asahina's shoulders.

"Ah..."

Haruhi smiled to a shrugging Asahina.

"Mikuru-chan, try to look a little cuter, OK?"

That said, Haruhi proceeded to loosen Asahina's ribbon, then quickly unbuttoned three buttons on her blouse. Almost instantaneously revealing Asahina's large bosom.

"W-wait! No... what are you doing...!?"

"Don't worry, it doesn't really matter, does it?"

Of course it matters, missy!

In the end, Asahina was forced to place her hands on her lap and slightly lean forward. Faced with Asahina's well-endowed bust, which was in stark contrast to her small body and cute face, I quickly turned my eyes away. But I wouldn't have been able to take any pictures that way, so faced with no choice, I turned my eyes back to the camera and pressed the shutter repeatedly as Haruhi had ordered.

Poor Asahina was made to perform poses which further emphasized the curves on her breasts, and she was so embarrassed her face got even redder. Yet, even as she was about to cry, she still tried her clumsiest best to smile, giving out a charm never seen before.

Damn it, I think I'm quickly falling in love with her.

"Yuki-chan, lend me your glasses."

Nagato Yuki slowly lifted her head, then slowly took off her glasses and gave them to Haruhi, and then slowly moved her gaze back to her book. Can you even read without glasses?

Haruhi took the glasses and placed them on Asahina's face.

"The glasses would look better if they're slightly tilted. There, that would be perfect! Kyon, remember to take more pictures of the four-eyed, innocent and well-endowed maid!"

Putting aside the argument of whether to take the photos or not, just what do you intend to do with the photos of Asahina in a maid costume anyway?

"Mikuru-chan, from now on you are to wear this costume every time you come for club activities!"

"How could you..."

Asahina tried her best to express refusal, but Haruhi grabbed her and caressed her face endlessly.

"Who asked you to be so cute? Man, even a girl like me can't resist doing this to you now!"

Asahina screamed and tried to escape, but to no avail, being at the mercy of Haruhi's molesting hands.

Damn, Haruhi, I'm so jealous of you. No, wait, how can I even think like that!? I should be trying to save her!

"All right, I think it's time for you to stop now!"

I tried to pull Haruhi away from her sexual harassment of Asahina, but she just wouldn't let go.

"That's enough, stop it already!"

"Does it matter? Why don't you join in as well?"

Not a bad idea actually, but seeing Asahina's face going white, I naturally said nothing.

"Whoa, what's going on here?"

Turning around, I saw Koizumi Itsuki standing at the entrance with his bag.

He looked amusedly first at Haruhi, whose hands were moving onto Asahina's breasts; then at me, who was trying to stop Haruhi's madness; then to Asahina in a maid costume, trembling nonstop; and finally to Nagato, who remained unfazed, peacefully reading her book even without her glasses.

"Is this some sort of club activity?"

"Koizumi, you came at just the right time! Let's play with Asahina!"

What on earth are you talking about!?

Koizumi only grinned. Please, if you actually agree with Haruhi's suggestions, then you've got some serious issues.

"No thanks, seems pretty scary to me."

Koizumi placed his bag on the table and unfolded one of the chairs by the wall.

"Mind if I just sit and watch?"

He sat with his legs crossed and looked at me as if he were watching a parade.

"Don't mind me. Please, continue."

No! You got it all wrong! I'm not trying to molest Asahina! I'm trying to save her!

Eventually, I was able to squeeze in between Haruhi and Asahina, and frantically picked up Asahina just in time before she fell on the ground. I was amazed by how light Asahina was as I placed her back on her seat. Asahina's maid costume was ragged and untidy, and she looked totally worn out, but honestly speaking, I thought she looked rather sexy.

"Oh well, we've taken plenty of photos anyway."

Asahina was so exhausted that she just weakly collapsed on the table. Haruhi took off the glasses from her cute face and returned them to Nagato.

Nagato silently received the glasses, putting them back on without saying a word. It's as though her endless speech last night never happened. She was fooling with me last night, wasn't she?

"Right, let's now begin the first SOS Brigade meeting!"

Haruhi, who was standing on the commander's seat, suddenly shouted. Please stop startling people by suddenly shouting!

"Before this, we've already done a lot of work. Like distributing flyers and setting up the webpage, the SOS Brigade's reputation in the school has soared sky high, so I announce phase one of the work to be a great success."

How can making Asahina mentally scarred be called a success!?

"But our inbox has yet to receive a single email about any mysterious events, and no one has yet come to us to discuss their concerns with their experiences."

Reputation alone doesn't help a lot, since until now, not everyone knows what this club is all about. Besides, the school doesn't even recognize this club!

"There used to be a saying that 'patience is virtue', but times have changed. Even if we have to turn the earth around, we'll find them on our own. So everyone, let's begin searching!"

"... What are we looking for?"

Since no one else asked, I decided to do it myself.

"To find out all the mysterious events of this world! As long as we try hard, we'll be able to find one or two events in this town!"

Your thinking is a mystery in itself, missy!

I displayed my reluctance, Koizumi only smiled enigmatically, Nagato remained wooden faced, while Asahina seemed resigned to her fate, too exhausted to answer. Ignoring everyone's reactions, Haruhi waved her arms and yelled:

"This Saturday, which is tomorrow! We meet outside the north station before nine in the morning! Don't be late! Absentees will be executed!"

Sigh, not the death penalty again?

What did Haruhi do with Asahina's maid costume photos? I'm sure most of you have guessed, the stupid girl intended to upload all of them onto the webpage so that they could attract people to the website for discussion.

When I discovered this, she had just finished uploading them all on the front page to welcome visitors. She was even typing in the personal details.

Do you know what you're doing!? This could alert a lot of people!

I tried my best to stop her foolish behavior and had all the images removed. If Asahina had known that images of her posing sexily in her maid costume had been spread all over the world, she'd probably faint on the spot.

I quickly warned her about the dangers of putting personal details on the web, and amazingly for once, Haruhi actually paid attention and listened to me seriously. Eventually, as if to spite me, she said rather grumpily:

"I know that already!"

She then very reluctantly allowed me to remove the images from the page. At this moment, I should have been deleting all of Asahina's photos, but it would have been too much of a pity doing that. Hence, I secretly saved them all in a file document within the computer's hard drive and had it protected with a password.

Only I can view those photos!

Chapter 2

From the results, my premonition had come true.

After class, Haruhi didn't disappear instantly from the classroom as usual. This time she forcefully took my hand and dragged me out of the classroom, through the corridors, up the stairs, and finally stopped in front of the door leading to the rooftop.

That door is usually locked, and the staircase above the fourth floor seems to have been used as a storage room by the Art Club. Giant canvases, near broken picture frames, statues of war gods with missing noses and such are all piled up in this little staircase, making what is supposed to be a narrow space even narrower.

What is she trying to do to me by bringing me here?

"I need your help."

Haruhi said this while grabbing my tie. With her sharp glare aimed at the lower part of my head, I got the feeling she was threatening me.

"Help you with what?"

I feigned ignorance.

"Help me make a new club!"

"OK, then tell me, why must I help you complete something that you just suddenly thought up?"

"Because I need to secure a room for the club as well as members, so you need to find out what paperwork needs to be done for the school."

She wasn't even listening. I cast off Haruhi's hand.

"What club are you trying to make?"

"It doesn't matter! What's important is to make a club first."

I really doubt that the school would let us form a club whose activities are unknown.

"Now listen! After school today, you go and find out what needs to be done, and I'll go and find a room for the club. Okay?"

'NO!'

If I had replied like that, I was sure I would be killed. While I was hesitating on how to answer, Haruhi had already turned and walked down the stairs, leaving a disoriented male student standing all alone on the dust-filled staircase.

"... I haven't even agreed to help..."

Sigh, saying this to a plaster statue is pointless. I could only drag my heavy feet, thinking about how I would explain all this to my curious classmates.

Requirements for organizing an "association":

Five members or more. A sponsor teacher, club name, chairperson for the club, and club activities/goals summary are required—which then requires approval from the Student Council Executive Committee. The club's activities must fit in with the school philosophy of creativity and vivaciousness. Based on the activities' records and results, the Executive Committee would debate on whether to promote the association into a "study group." Furthermore, as an association, the school will not provide any funding.

I didn't have to explicitly search for the requirements because they are all listed out on the back of the student handbook.

Members are easy; we can just find anyone to make up the numbers, so that won't be a problem. A sponsor teacher is harder to find, but I think I can manage that. As for the name, something inoffensive would do. And the chairperson for the club is, no doubt, Haruhi herself.

I am willing to bet, however, that our club activities/goals summary is definitely not going to agree with "creativity and vivaciousness."

That being said, it's not as if Haruhi is the kind of person who cares about the rules.

As the bell rang for the end of classes, Haruhi showed off her horrifyingly brutish strength by gripping my jacket's sleeve and pulling me out of our classroom at kidnapping speed. It took great effort to make sure that I didn't leave my school bag in the classroom.

"Where are we going?"

I asked because, well, I'm normal after all.

"The Club Room."

Haruhi, so full of energy that she was able to kick away the slow moving people in front of us, simply answered with a short sentence, then kept her mouth shut. Please, can you at least let go of my hand first?

After we exited the first floor hallway, we went into another building and up the stairs. We walked into a dark hallway and at its center, Haruhi stopped. Of course, I stopped too.

There is a door in front of us.

Literature Club

The crooked name tag is pasted on the door.

"Here it is."

Without even knocking, Haruhi opened the door and walked into the classroom without any consideration. Of course, I followed her inside.

The room is surprisingly large, or maybe it seems that way because it only contains a rectangular table, metal chairs, and a bookshelf. A few cracks on the ceiling and the walls showed how ancient the building is.

Just as if she came with the room, a girl was sitting alone on a metal chair, reading a very thick hardcover book.

"From now on this will be our club room."

Haruhi opened her arms and announced formally. Her face was shining with that energetic smile. 'If only she would show that smile in class...' despite that thought, I didn't dare to say it out loud.

"Wait a second, what is this place?"

"The Cultural and Arts club building. This place has art and music rooms for the Art Club and the Orchestra Club. Clubs and associations without a regular club room all hold their activities here in this building, known as the Old Complex. And this classroom belongs to the Literature Club."

"Then what about the Literature Club?"

"After all the third year students graduated this spring, the club had zero members. As no new members were recruited, the club was going to be canceled. By the way, she's a first year who's their only new member."

"Then they haven't been canceled yet!"

"Close enough! A club with only one member is the same as none."

You idiot! Are you trying to take over other people's club rooms? I took a quick look at the Literature Club girl.

She was a girl with glasses and short hair.

Haruhi was already this loud. The girl, however, didn't even lift her head once. Apart from occasionally flipping the pages with her fingers, she appeared stationary, completely ignoring our presence. It seemed that this girl was strange as well!

I lowered my voice and asked Haruhi:

"Then what about that girl?"

"She said it doesn't matter!"

"Really?"

"I asked her already at lunch time. I said I need her to lend me the room and she said 'go ahead,' as long as she can read her book here in peace. Now that you mention it, she is pretty weird."

For you of all people to say that!

I observed the weird Literature Club girl carefully this time.

She had pale skin and an expressionless face. Her fingers were moving rhythmically like a robot. Just covering her pretty face, her short hair made one want to take off her glasses for a clearer view. She gave the impression of an inconspicuous puppet. In other words, a mysterious and expressionless weirdo!

Perhaps noticing my intrusive observation, the girl suddenly lifted her head and pushed the nose bridge of her glasses up with her fingers.

I saw her deep-colored eyes staring at me from under those lenses. Neither her eyes nor her lips showed any expression at all, almost like a mask. She was different from Haruhi—her face is the kind that fundamentally shows no sign of emotion.

"Nagato Yuki."

Her tone suggested that her name would be forgotten by most people within three seconds of hearing it.

Nagato Yuki stared at me for a moment; then as if losing interest, she turned her attention back to her book.

"Say, Nagato-san," I called out, "This girl here wants to use your club room for a yet-to-be-named club. Is this all right with you?"

"Yes."

Nagato's gaze never left her book once.

"But it might be troublesome for you."

"It doesn't matter."

"Maybe you'll even be evicted?"

"Please feel free."

Even though she answered promptly, she showed no expression. It seemed to me that she really didn't give a damn about it.

"Okay, then it's decided," Haruhi suddenly interrupted.

She sounded really hyper, giving me a bad feeling.

"From now on, we will meet in this room after class. Be sure to come! Or you're as good as dead!"

She said with a smile like the blooming cherry blossoms. I reluctantly nodded my head.

Please, I don't want to die yet!

So we've now found a club room, but there was absolutely no progress with the paperwork. We still hadn't decided on a club name or what activities it intended to hold. I had asked Haruhi to sort these things out first, but she seemed to have other ideas.

"We can decide on all that later!" Haruhi declared loudly. "Right now the most important thing is to recruit members. We still need at least two more people."

So, you've already counted the Literature Club girl in as well? You couldn't possibly have treated Nagato Yuki as a mere club accessory, could you?

"Don't worry about that. I'll be able to gather people soon; I already have someone in mind."

How can I not worry? My unease has become even more profound!

The next day after school, after turning down Taniguchi and Kunikida's offer to walk home with them, I reluctantly dragged my heavy feet and headed towards the club room.

Haruhi only said "You go first!" and rushed out of the classroom with a speed that the Athletic Club so badly needed. She was so fast that I wondered if she had added boosters in her shoes. I didn't know whether she was in a hurry to find new club members, or whether she was just plain excited that she had taken a step forward in meeting extraterrestrials?

On the other hand, I could only carry my bag, so I moved slowly towards the Literature Club room.

Entering the club room, I discovered Nagato Yuki already inside, sitting in the same position while reading her book. I slowly approached her, but as with yesterday her head was buried in the book, my presence ignored. Was the Literature Club a pure reading club? Why else would she be reading all the time?

Silence in the classroom.

"... What are you reading?"

I asked, not being able to stand the silence any longer. Nagato Yuki answered by raising the book and showing me the cover. My eyes saw a large bunch of dazzling foreign words; it seemed like some sort of science fiction novel.

"Is it interesting?"

Nagato Yuki pushed her glasses upwards effortlessly before replying in an empty tone:

"Unique."

It seemed that she'd answer anything I asked her.

"Which part?"

"All of it."

"So you like reading?"

"Very."

"I see..."

"..."

Back to silence again.

Can I go home now?

I thought of that while putting my bag on the desk. Just as I prepared to sit down on the steel chair, the door crashed open like it was being kicked.

"Hey, sorry I'm late! It took me some time trying to catch this gal!"

Haruhi finally arrived, waving one hand at us. Her other hand was holding onto someone else's wrist— she'd abducted another person! When Haruhi entered the room, for some reason she locked the door. Click! Hearing that sound, the light-sized girl shuddered uncomfortably.

Wow, she sure is pretty.

She must be Haruhi's "chosen candidate."

"W... what are you doing?"

The girl said, close to tears now.

"W-where is this place? Why did you bring me here? And, w-why are you locking the door? What do you want with me?"

"Be quiet!"

Haruhi barked with such force that the girl simply stood in stunned silence.

"Let me introduce her: this is Asahina Mikuru-chan."

After announcing the girl's name, Haruhi stopped talking. Seems like that's all for the introduction.

Silence once again engulfed the classroom. Haruhi looked satisfied with "a job well done"; Nagato Yuki, as usual, kept reading her book without any reaction; and the girl called Asahina Mikuru was simply scared silly. Hey, why isn't anyone talking? And so I started the conversation.

"Where did you abduct her from?"

"This isn't abduction! I just forced her to come with me."

That's the same thing!

"I found her daydreaming in the second year classroom, so I caught her from there. I explore the corners of the school during recess, so I've seen her a few times already."

So that's what you've been doing during recess time when you're nowhere to be seen in the classroom. No, wait, now isn't the time to think about this.

"Anyway, she's our senpai!"

"So?"

I looked at her in disbelief. Oh god, this girl doesn't even think about what she's doing!

"Fine then... tell me, why did you need to find her, erm, Asahina-senpai, right?"

"Here, have a look."

Haruhi suddenly pointed towards Asahina Mikuru's nose, causing her to back off instantly.

"Isn't she cute?"

That's something only a dangerous kidnapper would say! That's what I thought of anyway.

"I believe Moe characters are important!" she continued.

"... Excuse me, what did you just say?"

"I said Moe! The factor to turn people on! Basically, most detective stories have some characters that would turn people on and cause them to be pitied."

I automatically turned and observed Asahina Mikuru: she has a small body and a face that could easily be mistaken for an elementary school student. Her brown hair is slightly curly, hanging over her back. Her pair of large puppy dog eyes give out a "please protect me" aura. Her half-opened lips reveal a row of white ivory-like teeth that, coupled with her small face, create a perfect combination. If she were given a magic wand with a shiny jewel, she might even transform into a little fairy! Aargh~, what the hell am I thinking about!?

"And that's not all!"

Haruhi smiled confidently, and then she grabbed Asahina Mikuru from behind with her hands.

"Kyaaa!!"

Asahina screamed instantly. But Haruhi was unmoved, clutching her breasts through her sailor uniform.

"Aaaaa!"

"She's so small, yet her breasts are larger than mine! A cute face plus large breasts is also an important factor in turning people on!"

Oh my god, I'm about to faint.

"Wow, they really are big."

Haruhi stuck her hands into Asahina's uniform and started groping. Stop it, you pervert!

"Man, this pisses me off! Her face is so cute, yet her breasts are bigger than mine!"

"H-Help!!"

Asahina blushed bright red. She tried to struggle free with her arms and legs, but her strength was no match for her harasser. As Haruhi started to move her hands towards Asahina's skirt, I finally couldn't take it any longer and pulled the perverted girl away from Asahina.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!?"

"But they really are huge! It's true! Why don't you give them a go as well?"

Asahina moaned weakly.

"No thanks."

That was all I could say.

What surprised me was, during all this commotion, Nagato Yuki had]]> Buzznet animegalaxy000 2007-08-11T16:00:21Z http://animegalaxy000.buzznet.com/user/journal/693241/ Chapter 1

(Volume 1 cover)

And so, I entered the senior high school in my area. At first, I regretted this decision as my new school sat on top of a very high hill. Even during spring, students would become hot and sweaty just from climbing the steep road — clearly, my intention of "going to school leisurely" was not going to work. Every time I remembered this, along with the fact that I would have to repeat the same procedure every day for the next three years, I became tired and depressed. I overslept a bit today. Perhaps that's why I walked so much faster, and perhaps that was why I was so tired then. I could have woken up ten minutes earlier, but, as all of you know, you sleep best right before it's time to get up. I didn't want to waste that precious 10 minutes, so I gave up on the thought, which meant that I would need to repeat this early exercise for the next three years. This was just too depressing.

That was the reason for my lone grim face in the time-wasting entrance ceremony. Everyone else had the "starting a new journey" look on their face; you know, the unique "hopeful, yet filled with uncertainty" look that every new student wears when they enter a new school. For me, this was not the case — a lot of old classmates from my old junior high school were also coming to this school. To cap it off, a few of my friends were also here. Thus, I didn't look as worried, or excited, as other people.

The guys were wearing sport jackets, and the girls were wearing the sailor uniform. Wow, that's a pretty weird combination. Maybe the snore-inducing principal giving a speech on the stage had some sort of fetish for sailor uniforms. As I was thinking about these useless things, the idiotic ceremony finally ended. I, along with my not-so-willing new classmates, entered the 1-5 classroom.

Our homeroom teacher, Okabe-sensei, with his practiced-for-an-hour-in-front-of-a-mirror smile, walked to the front of the class and gave a self-introduction. He first said that he was a PE teacher, and was the managing teacher for the handball team. Then he moved on to stuff like how, back when he was in university, he used to play on the handball team, and even won the championship, and that this school seriously lacked handball players, so whoever entered the team would become a regular instantly. And then he said stuff like how handball was the most interesting sport in the world and what-have-you. Just when I thought that he would never finish, he suddenly blurted out:

"Now, let's introduce ourselves!"

This kind of thing was pretty common, though, so I wasn't surprised.

One by one, the people on the left side of the class started to introduce themselves. They raised their hand, then announced their name, the name of their old school, and other trivial stuff, such as a hobby or favorite food. Some people mumbled their way through it, a few had some pretty interesting introductions, while some tried to tell lame jokes that lowered the room's temperature by a substantial degree. As the different people introduced themselves, my turn was approaching. I'm starting to get nervous! Everyone should understand how I'm feeling right now, right?

After I managed to finish my carefully thought-out, minimal-length introduction without stumbling over my words too much, I sat down, feeling the relief you get after having finished something unpleasant but necessary. The person behind me stood up for her turn and―ah, I probably won't forget this for the rest of my life―said the words that would be the topic of conversation for a long time.

"My name is Suzumiya Haruhi. I graduated from East Junior High."

Up to this point the introduction was still normal, so I didn't even bother turning around to look at her. I just stared at the front and listened to her crisp voice.

"Normal humans don't interest me. If anyone here is an alien, a time traveler, slider, or an esper, then come find me! That is all."

Upon hearing that, I couldn't help but turn around.

She had long and slender black hair. Her cute face was filled with daring and challenge as the rest of the class stared at her. Her seriousness and determination shone through her glinting eyes and long eyebrows. Her small lips were tightly pursed. This was my first impression of this girl.

I still remember how gleaming her white throat was— she turned out to be quite pretty.

Haruhi, with her provocative eyes, scanned the class slowly, stopped to glare at me (I had my mouth wide open), and then sat down without so much as a smile.

Was she trying to be dramatic?

At that moment I believe everyone's mind was filled with question marks, and that everyone was confused as to what their reaction should be. "Should I laugh?" No one knew.

Well, judging by the conclusion, she wasn't trying to be dramatic or funny, as Haruhi always has her solemn face on.

She is always serious.

This is based on hindsight—it can't be wrong.

After the fairies of silence danced around the classroom for thirty-something seconds, the homeroom teacher, with some hesitation, signaled the next person to continue, and the tense atmosphere lifted.

That is how we met.

How unforgettable. I really want to believe that this was all a coincidence.

After she grabbed everyone's attention on the first day, Haruhi reverted to being an innocent high school girl.

This was the calm before the storm! I finally understand it all now.

Anyway, everyone in this school came from one of the four junior high schools in the city— people with average grades. This, of course, includes East Junior High; therefore there should be people in the class who graduated with Haruhi, who knew what her silence symbolized. Unfortunately, I did not know any former East Junior High students, thus no one could explain to me how serious the situation was. Consequently, a few days after that explosive introduction, I did something I would never forget—I tried to talk to her before class.

My dominos of misfortune had begun to fall, and I was the person who pushed the first block!

You see, when Haruhi sits quietly in her seat, she looks just like a normal, cute girl, so I planned to sit right in front of her to get close to her. I actually thought this would work. How naive of me. Someone please beat some sense into me.

Of course, I started the conversation with that incident.

"Hey hey."

I casually turned my head around, with that airy smile all over my face.

"The stuff you said in your intro, were you being serious?"

With her arm crossed on her chest, lips sealed together, Suzumiya Haruhi kept her posture, then stared right into my eyes.

"What 'stuff in my intro'?"

"The stuff about the aliens."

"Are you an alien?"

She looked very serious.

"... No."

"If you are not, then what do you want?"

"... No, nothing."

"Then don't talk to me. You are wasting my time."

Her glare was so cold that I found myself stuttering "sorry" before realizing it. Suzumiya Haruhi then removed her glare from me disdainfully, and started to frown at the blackboard.

I was going to whip back a line or two, but I couldn't think of anything good to say. Thankfully, at that moment the homeroom teacher came into the classroom and saved me.

I turned my head back to my desk damply, and noticed that a few people were looking at me with a look of great interest on their face. This, of course, made me feel very annoyed. After I stared back at them, however, I noticed that they all had the same feeble expression on their faces. Some even nodded at me with sympathy.

As I said, at first I felt very irritated, but later on I learned that all those people graduated from East Junior High.

Given that my first contact with Haruhi had ended horribly I figured that I should keep my distance from her for now, for safety's sake. With that in mind, a week passed by.

But, just as I was still part of this class, there were always people who wanted to talk to the eyebrow-locking scowling-mouthed Haruhi.

Most of the people were those fussy girls; the second they see that a fellow female classmate is becoming isolated they try to be kind and help the girl. This is a good thing, but they should at least check their target beforehand!

"Hi, did you see that TV show last night? The 9 o'clock one."

"No."

"Eh, why?"

"I don't know."

"You should try it. Even if you started in the middle you wouldn't be lost. Do you need me to go over the previous story for you?"

"You are annoying!"

That's how it went.

It would be much better if she could just answer no with her poker face. But no, she had to show her impatience in both her expression and her voice. This just made her victim believe that they did something wrong. At the end he/she could only say "I see... then I'll just...", and ask themselves "What did I say wrong?" and whimper away.

Don't be so sad; you didn't say anything wrong. The problem is with Suzumiya Haruhi's brain, not yours.

Even though I didn't mind eating alone, I didn't want others to think that I was a loner when everyone else was happily eating their lunch with their friends. That's why, even though I didn't care if others misunderstood, I ate my lunch together with my junior high school classmate Kunikida and an East Junior High graduate named Taniguchi, who sat close to me.

We started to talk about Haruhi.

"Did you try to talk to Suzumiya?" Taniguchi asked innocently. I nodded.

"And then she said some weird stuff and you didn't know how to react?"

"That's right!"

Taniguchi put his sliced boiled egg into his mouth, chewed, and said:

"If that girl is interested in you, she wouldn't say weird stuff like that. All I can advise you is to give up! You should know by now that she's not normal.

"I was in her class three years in a row; I know how she is."

He used this line as the beginning of his speech.

"She always does incredibly baffling things. I thought she would at least try to control herself after she got into senior high; apparently she hasn't. You heard her introduction speech, right?"

"You mean the alien stuff?"

Kunikida, who was busy picking bones out of his fried fish, had butted in.

"Yeah that. Even back in junior high she always said and did lots of weird stuff. For example there was this school vandalization incident!"

"What happened?"

"You know that one tool where you use plaster dust to draw field lines, right? What's it called... Anyway, she sneaked into school at night and, with that thing, drew a huge huge symbol in the middle of the field."

Taniguchi had a mischievous smile on his face— he was probably remembering the incident.

"That was so shocking. I went to school early that morning, and all I saw were big circles and triangles. I couldn't figure out what they were supposed to be, so I went up to the fourth floor to get a bird's eye view. That didn't help— I still didn't know what that symbol was."

"Ah, I think I saw that before. Didn't the newspaper have a story on it? It even had a helicopter view of it! The symbol looked like a broken Nazca pictogram," Kunikida said.

I don't remember hearing about that before.

"I saw the article, I saw it. The headline was something like 'Mystery Vandal Strikes Junior High At Night,' right? Well, care to guess who pulled that stunt?"

"Don't tell me it's her."

"She admitted it herself. There's no mistaking it. Naturally, she got called into the principal's office. Every teacher was there, questioning her on why she did it."

"Why did she do it, then?"

"I don't know," Taniguchi answered flatly, as he tried to swallow a mouthful of rice.

"I heard she refused to say anything. Of course, when you're getting glared at by her, you tend to give up on whatever you're planning. Someone said that she drew the symbol to call out to UFOs, others said that it was a magic symbol and was used in summoning monsters, or that she was trying to open a portal to different worlds, et cetera... There were many speculations, but as long as the perpetrator refuses to talk, we may never know if those rumors are true or not. To this day it's still a mystery."

For some reason, the picture of Haruhi, with her no-nonsense look, busy laying the lines in the middle of the school field at night, floated into my mind. She definitely prepared the drawing tools and the limestone powders beforehand in the storage room; maybe she even bought a flashlight! Under its dim yellow light Suzumiya Haruhi looked very sober and tragic... OK, this was just my imagination.

But truth be told Suzumiya Haruhi was probably really doing it to summon UFOs or monsters, or even a dimensional portal. She probably worked on it the whole night in the field, but nothing showed up, and all she was left with was that beat down feeling, I thought to myself.

"That's not the only thing she did!"

Taniguchi continued to finish his lunch.

"Once I came to the classroom in the morning and discovered that all the desks were moved out to the corridor, or that there were printed stars on the school roof. Another time she was going around the school O-fuda all over the place... you know, those Chinese ones where you put the paper talisman on a vampire's forehead. I just can't understand her."

That's right, Suzumiya Haruhi was not inside the classroom right then, or else we wouldn't have been having this conversation. But then again, even if she did hear us, she probably wouldn't have cared. Usually, Suzumiya Haruhi left the classroom immediately after fourth period, then came back right before the fifth period. She didn't carry a lunch box, so I had assumed that she went to the cafeteria to enjoy her lunch; but it doesn't take the whole hour to eat lunch, does it? Furthermore, at the end of every period, she disappeared. Where did she go anyway...?

"But she is very popular with the guys!"

Taniguchi piped in:

"She's cute, athletic, and smart. Even though she is peculiar, if she keeps her mouth shut, she's actually not bad."

"Where did you learn all this gossip?" Kunikida asked, with his lunch box twice as full as Taniguchi's.

"There was a period of time where she switched boyfriends non-stop. From what I heard, the longest relationship lasted a week, the shortest one ended 5 minutes after the confession. In addition, the only reason Suzumiya gave for dumping her boyfriends was 'I don't have time to socialize with normal humans.'"

Taniguchi seemed to be speaking from experience. After he noticed my stare, he became a bit flustered.

"I heard this from other people! Honest! For some reason, she wouldn't turn down a confession. By the third year, everyone understood; so no one wanted to confess to her anymore. I have a funny feeling that history will repeat itself in senior high. So I am warning you now: give up. This is coming from someone who was in the same class as her."

Say whatever you want, I was not interested in her that way.

Taniguchi put his empty lunch-box back into his bag, and let out a sinister giggle.

"If I had to choose one, I would choose her, Asakura Ryouko."

Taniguchi nodded his chin towards a group of girls a few desks away. In the middle of the conversing group, with a rosy smile on her face, was Asakura Ryouko.

"Judging from my analysis, she definitely enters the 'Top Three Cutest First Year Girls' list."

"You have every single first year girl in this school checked out?"

"I group girls into A to D categories and, believe me, I only remember the names of the A girls. You only get to go through high school life once— I want mine to be as happy as possible."

"Then that Asakura Ryouko is an A then?" Kunikida asked.

"She is AA+! Come on, just look at her face, her personality must be first class."

Even ignoring Taniguchi's egoistic comments, Asakura Ryouko was quite a different kind of cute girl than Suzumiya Haruhi was.

First of all, she was very pretty; plus she always let off a smile-like caring impression. Second, her personality did seem to match Taniguchi's description. These days no one dared to talk to Suzumiya Haruhi anymore, except for Asakura Ryouko. No matter how harsh Suzumiya Haruhi was, Asakura Ryouko still tried to talk to her from time to time. She was so passionate that she almost acted like the class monitor. Third, from the way she answered teachers' questions in class alone, you could see that she was very smart. She always answered the questions correctly — in the eyes of the teachers she was probably a model student. To top it off, she was extremely popular with the girls. The term had only been going for a week, and she was already well on her way to being the center of the female students in the class. It was as though she had fallen from the sky and had been born with extreme attraction in mind!

Compared to the often scowling, science fiction-obsessed Suzumiya Haruhi, the choice was obvious. Then again, these two candidates were both probably too high up the hill for our hero Taniguchi to climb. No way was he going to get either of them.

It was still April then, and, at that time, Suzumiya was actually behaving quite nicely. To me, this was quite a relaxing month. At the very least, there would be a month to go before Haruhi started going astray.

But, even during this time, I'd observed some of Haruhi's eccentric behaviors.

Why would I say that?

Clue #1: She changed her hairstyle every day. Furthermore, judging from my observation, there was some sort of a pattern going on. On Monday, Haruhi would come to school with her long hair down, without tying it up whatsoever. On the next day, she would tie it up in a ponytail. As much as I hate to admit it, that hair style did look good on her. Then, she would tie two ponytails on the next day, and three ponytails the day after; by Friday, she would have four ribbon-tied ponytails on her head. Her actions were really enigmatic!

Monday = 0, Tuesday = 1, Wednesday = 2...

As the day of the week increased, so would the number of her ponytails; by next Monday, the whole process would start again. I couldn't see why she was doing it. Following the previous logic, she should have had six ponytails on Sunday... I suddenly wanted to see her Sunday hairstyle.

Clue #2: For PE, classes 1-5 and 1-6 would combine and have PE together, with the boys and girls separated. When we changed clothes, the girls would go to the 1-5 classroom, and the boys would go to the 1-6 classroom; meaning at the end of the previous period, the guys from our class (1-5) would move to the other room to change.

Unfortunately, Haruhi totally ignored the guys in our class, and removed her sailor uniform before the guys had left.

It was as if, to her, the guys were pumpkins or potato sacks, and she couldn't care less. Without any expression, she would throw her uniform onto the desk and start to get into her sweatshirt.

At that moment, Asakura Ryouko would drive the goggle-eyed, frozen guys, myself included, out of the classroom.

According to rumors, the girls, with Asakura Ryouko as their leader, tried to talk Haruhi out of doing that, but to no avail. Every PE class, Haruhi would ignore the rest of the class and take her uniform off without so much as a glance. And so, we guys were asked to leave the classroom the second the bell rang— at the request of Asakura Ryouko.

But seriously, Haruhi has a really great figure... argh, this isn't the time to say that kind of thing.

Clue #3: At the end of every block, Haruhi would go AWOL. When the school bell came rolling around, she would grab her backpack and shoot out of the classroom. Logically, I thought that she went straight back to her house; I would never have thought that she would go and participate in all the clubs in the school. One day, you would see her passing balls in the Basketball Club, and the next you would see her sewing a pillow case in the Sewing Club. By the following day, you would see her waving her stick in the Hockey Club. I think she also joined the Baseball Club. So, basically, she had participated in every sport club in our school. All the clubs tried to persuade her into joining them of course, but she turned them all down. Her explanation was: "It is annoying for me to do the same club activity everyday." At the end of the day, she didn't join any clubs.

What is that girl trying to pull?

From this alone, news of a "weird first year girl" spread throughout the school almost instantly. Within a month, there was not a single person who didn't know who Suzumiya Haruhi was. Fast forwarding to May, people may still not have known who the principal was, but Suzumiya Haruhi was a household name.

So, with all this stuff going on— and Haruhi always the cause— May arrived.

Though I personally think that destiny is even less believable than the Loch Ness monster, if destiny, at some unknown place, is actively influencing human lives, my wheel of fate had probably begun to turn. Conceivably, in some remote mountain there was probably some old guy who was busy rewriting my destiny.

After the end of the Golden Week holiday, I walked to school, not sure what day of the week it was. The unnaturally sunny May weather blasted onto my skin and made me soaked with sweat— the steep hill didn't seem to end either. Just what is it that the Earth wants? Is it suffering from yellow fever or something?

"Hey, Kyon."

From behind, somebody clapped me on the shoulder. It was Taniguchi.

His blazer hung slovenly on his shoulders, his necktie was wrinkled and skewed to one side.

"Where did you go for Golden Week?"

"I took my little sister to see my grandma in the countryside."

"How dull."

"Fine, what did you do, then?"

"Part time all the way."

"You don't look like that kind of person."

"Kyon, you are in senior high now— why do you still bring your little sister to see your grandpa and grandma? You gotta at least look like a senior high student."

By the way, Kyon would be me. My aunt was the one who first called me that. A few years ago, my long-time-no-see aunt suddenly said to me "My goodness, Kyon has grown so big!" My sister thought it was funny and also started to call me Kyon. After that the rest is history— my friends, upon hearing my sister calling me Kyon, decided to follow her lead. From that day on, my nickname became Kyon. Damn it, my sister used to call me "Onii-chan"!

"It is a tradition of my family's to have a cousin gathering during Golden Week," I answered as I climbed the hill.

The sweating sensation made me feel uncomfortable.

Taniguchi, long winded as always, boasted how he had met some cute girls at his workplace, and how he planned to use the money he saved to go on dates and such. Frankly, topics like what dreams people have, or how amazing or cute someone's pet is, are in my book, some of the dullest topics in the world.

As I listened to Taniguchi's date schedule (apparently he wasn't stopped by little problems such as how no one was going with him), we arrived at the school gate.

Suzumiya Haruhi was already sitting behind my seat staring at the outside when I entered the classroom. She had two bun-like hair clippers on her head; I guess today is Wednesday. After sitting down— for some reason which I do not know, the only explanation being that I was going nuts, before I realized it— I found myself once again talking to Suzumiya Haruhi.

"Do you change your hair style each day because of the aliens?"

Like a robot, Suzumiya Haruhi turned her face slowly towards me, and stared at me with her dead serious expression. It was pretty scary, actually.

"When did you notice?"

Her tone was so cold that it was as though she was talking to a rock on the side of the road.

I paused for a while to think about it.

"Hmm... for a while."

"Really?"

Haruhi put her chin on her palm, looking irritated.

"At least that's what I think, because you look and feel different to me everyday."

This was the first time we'd had a proper conversation!

"For color: Monday is yellow, Tuesday is red, Wednesday is blue, Thursday is green, Friday is gold, Saturday is brown, and Sunday is white."

I can sort of understand what she is trying to say.

"Then that means if we use numbers to represent the color, Monday is zero and Sunday is six, right?"

"That's correct."

"But shouldn’t Monday be one?"

"Who asked for your opinion?"

"... Yeah, right."

Seemingly unsatisfied by my answer, Haruhi scowled at me. I just sat there uncomfortably and let time slip by.

"Have I seen you somewhere before? A long time ago?"

"Don't think so."

After I answered, Okabe-sensei lightly entered the classroom, and our first conversation ended.

Even though our first conversation is nothing to write home about, this could become the changing point I have been looking for!

Then again, the only chance I could talk to Haruhi was the bit of time before homeroom session, as she's usually not in the room during recess. But as I sit in front of her, I am fairly certain that my chances of talking to her are far greater than those of others.

But the thing that shocked me the most is that Haruhi actually answered me properly. I originally thought that she would go like, “You are annoying, moron, shut up! Whatever!” I guess that I'm just as weird as her, for actually finding the guts to go and talk to her.

Therefore when I came to school the next day and discovered that instead of tying three ponytails, Haruhi had cut her long and slender hair short, I felt quite depressed.

The waist length hair has been shortened to shoulder length. I mean, even though the hairstyle does suit her, she cut her hair the day after I talked to her about it! She is obviously looking down on me. What the hell!

When I asked for her reason, however:

"No reason."

She answered with her trademark irritated tone but didn't show any sort of special expression. She was not going to tell me the reason.

But I expected that, so that's all right.

"Did you really try to join all the clubs?"

From that day on, talking to her using the bit of time before the home room session became my daily routine. Of course, if I didn't try to start the conversation, Haruhi would show no sign of reaction. Another thing is that if I talk to her about how last night's TV show was, or how the weather is, etc.— those she deemed as "idiotic topics"— she would just ignore me. Knowing that, I carefully picked the conversation topic whenever I talked to her.

"Is there a club that is more fun than the others? I'd like to consider joining some myself."

"None." Haruhi answered flatly. "Absolutely none."

She emphasizes this again, then slowly let out a breath. Is she sighing?

"I thought that high school would be a bit better. In the end it's the same as mandatory education. Nothing changes at all. Looks like I joined the wrong school."

Miss, what criteria did you employ when you decided which school to attend?

"Sports clubs and cultural clubs are all the same. If only there were some unique clubs in school..."

"Well, what gave you the right to decide if other clubs are normal or not?"

"Shut up. If I like a club, then it's unique; otherwise it's plain."

"Really? I knew you would say that."

"Hmph!"

She turned her face away in annoyance, marking the end of the day's conversation.

Another day:

"I overheard something the other day... It's not something important anyway... Did you really dump all your boyfriends?"

"Why do I need to hear this from you again?"

She brushed her hair by her shoulders, and stared at me with her bright black eyes. God, other than being expressionless, this angry expression seems to appear often on her face.

"Did that Taniguchi tell you? God, I can't believe that I'm in the same class as that idiot even after I graduated junior high. He isn't one of those stalking psychos, is he?”

"I don't think so," I thought.

"I don't know what you heard, but it doesn't matter, most of them are true anyway."

"Isn't there someone out there you want to have a serious relationship with?"

"Absolutely no one!"

Total dismissal seems to be her motto.

"Every single one of them is a moron, I just can't engage in any serious relationship with them. Each one of them would ask me to meet him at the train station on Sunday, then for sure we would go to movies, amusement park, or to a ball game. The first time we eat together would always be a lunch date then we would rush off to a café to drink tea. At the end of the day they would always say 'see you tomorrow'!"

"I don't see anything wrong with that!" I thought personally; but I didn't dare say that out loud. If Haruhi says it's bad, then it must be bad for her.

"Then, without fail, they would confess over the phone. What the Hell! This is a sober subject, at least tell me face-to-face!!"

I can sympathize with those guys. Making such an important― to them, at least― confession to someone who looks at you like you are a worm would probably make anyone feel uneasy. They lost their nerve just from seeing your expression! I'm imagining what those guys were thinking as I respond to Haruhi.

"Hmm, you are right. I would ask the girl out and tell her directly."

"Who the hell cares about you!"

What the... Did I say something wrong again?

"The problem is, are all the boys in this world such dim-witted creatures? I have been agitated by this question since junior high."

Now it's not any better is it!

"Then, what kind of boy would you consider 'interesting'? Is it going to be aliens after all?"

"I am fine with aliens or similar things as long as they are not normal. Be they male or female."

"Why do you always insist on something other than human?"

When I blabbed that out Haruhi looked at me with disdain.

"Because humans are no fun at all!"

"That... maybe you are right."

Even I can't counter Haruhi's idea; if it turns out that this cute transfer student is half earthling and half alien, even I would think that's cool. If Taniguchi, currently sitting next to me and spying on Haruhi and me, is a detective from the future, it would be even cooler. If Asakura Ryouko, who for some reason keeps smiling at me, has any sort of supernatural power, then my school life would be as exciting as one can get.

But none of it is possible— no aliens, time travelers, or supernatural powers exist in this world. Okay, let's say they do exist. They wouldn't just appear right in front of us humble citizens and say, "Hello, I'm actually an alien."

"THAT'S WHY!"

Haruhi suddenly stood up and knocked her chair down, causing everyone to turn and look at her.

"THAT’S WHY I AM WORKING SO HARD!!"

"Sorry I am late!"

The always-optimistic Okabe-sensei, who is pretty out of breath, rushed into the classroom. When he saw the whole class looking at Haruhi standing, her fists clenched, eyes fixed at the ceiling, he became just as surprised and just stood there.

"Er... Homeroom is about to start!"

Haruhi sat down immediately and glared at the corner of her desk. Phew!

I turned around, the whole class followed suit and turned their heads as well. Then Okabe-sensei, obviously disoriented by the commotion, wobbled to the stage and let out a soft cough.

"I apologize for being late. Eh... Then let's begin!"

He repeats again, and the class atmosphere finally reverts to normal— even though this is the sort of atmosphere that Haruhi hates the most!

Maybe, life is just like that?

But, to tell you the truth, deep inside my heart I'm really envious of Haruhi's attitude towards life.

She still has the aspiration that she'll meet someone from the supernatural world that I abandoned long ago, and she enthusiastically tries to achieve her dream. If sitting around waiting is not going to achieve anything, let's call them ourselves! This is why Haruhi does things like drawing white lines on the school field, painting symbols on the school roof, and pasting cursed paper talismans everywhere.

Sigh!

I don't know when Haruhi started to do weird stuff that made others mistake her as an occultist. Waiting achieves nothing, so why not perform some weird ceremonies to call them out? At the end of the day, however, nothing happened. Maybe that's why Haruhi always has that "damn-the-whole-world" look on her face...?

"Hey, Kyon."

After class, Taniguchi, with his mystified face, tried to corner me. Taniguchi, you look like a total moron with that expression of yours!

"Be quiet! I don't care what you say. Anyway what kind of magical spell did you cast?"

"What magical spell?"

Highly advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic! I remembered this proverb as I ask Taniguchi back. He then pointed his finger at Haruhi's now vacant seat.

"This is the first time I've seen Suzumiya talk to a person for so long! What did you guys talk about?"

That, ah, what did we talk about? I just asked her some normal questions, that's all.

"How very shocking!"

Taniguchi sarcastically put on an in-awe expression, then Kunikida popped up from behind Taniguchi.

"Kyon has a history of liking strange girls."

Hey, don't say things that'll create a misunderstanding.

"It doesn't matter if Kyon likes strange girls. What I can't understand is why Suzumiya would talk to you? I don't get it at all."

"Maybe Kyon is as weird as her?"

"Probably. I mean you can't expect someone with a nickname like Kyon to be normal."

Stop calling me Kyon, Kyon, Kyon! Rather than being called by that stupid nickname, just use my real name! At the very least I wanted to hear my sister call me "Onii-chan"!

"I want to know too."

The voice of a cheerful girl came out of nowhere. I lifted my head, and of course, saw Asakura Ryouko's innocently smiling face.

"I tried talking to Suzumiya-san a few times already but nothing came of it. Could you teach me how I should talk to her?"

I acted like I thought about this for a while; actually, I didn't even think at all.

"I dunno."

Upon hearing this, Asakura smiled.

"I am so relieved now. She can't go on being isolated from her classmates like that, so it's great that you've become her friend.”

Asakura Ryouko cares for her like a class monitor because, well, she is the class monitor. She was elected as the class monitor in our last lengthy homeroom session.

"Friend, huh?"

I shook my head uncertainly. Is it really like that? But, the only expression Haruhi gives me whenever I talk to her is a scowl!

"You need to continue helping Suzumiya-san so that she can get along with the class. We're in the same class after all so we're counting on you!"

Sigh, even if you say that, I don't even know what I'm supposed to do!

"If there is anything I need to tell Suzumiya-san, I could just ask you to pass the message to her!"

No, wait! I'm not her spokesman!

"Please?" she asked sincerely, putting her palms together.

Faced with her request, I could only give vague responses like "erm" and "ahh...". Asakura took that as a yes and showed her yellow-tulip-like smile, and then went back to the other girls. After seeing that the other girls were looking at me, my heart fell to the bottom of a canyon.

"Kyon, we are good friends right...?" Taniguchi asked, staring at me suspiciously.

"What the hell is going on here?"

Even Kunikida, with his eyes closed and arms crossed on his chest, nodded.

Oh my god! Why am I surrounded by a bunch of idiots?

It seems that someone decided that everyone in class needed to change their seats monthly. Therefore the class monitor Asakura wrote all the seat numbers onto little pieces of paper, placed them in a cookie tin, and let each of us draw from it. In the end I got the seat in the second to last row next to the window that overlooks the courtyard. Guess who took the last seat right behind me? That's right. It's the ever scowling Haruhi!

"Why hasn't something interesting happened yet?! Like little grade school kids disappearing one by one, or some teachers getting murdered inside a locked classroom?"

"Stop saying that kind of scary stuff!"

"I joined the Mystery Study Group."

"Oh? What happened?"

"It was so idiotic. Nothing interesting happened! Furthermore, all the club members are detective novel fans but there isn't anyone there that resembles a detective!"

"Isn't that normal?"

"I actually had hopes for the Supernatural Study Group."

"Really?"

"But they all turned out to be a bunch of occult maniacs. Does that sound fun to you?"

"Not really."

"Ah, man, this is too boring! Why doesn't this school have any decently interesting club?"

"Well, there's not much you can do about that."

"I thought after I graduated to senior high I would encounter some kick ass clubs! Sigh, this is like trying to go into the Major League but then you discover that the school you're attending doesn't even have a baseball team."

Haruhi looked as if she were some sort of banshee ready to go to a hundred Buddhist monasteries to lay some curses. She stared at the sky with disdain and let out a huge sigh.

Should I pity her?

I don't know what sort of clubs Haruhi likes. Maybe even she doesn't know the answer. She just wants to "do something interesting." What is "something interesting?" Does that involve solving a murder mystery? Searching for UFOs? Or exorcism? I think she has no idea either.

"I think it can't be helped if there aren't any."

I decided to express my opinion.

"Judging from the results, humans are usually content with their current states. Those who aren't, however, will try to invent or discover something to advance civilization. Someone wanted to fly so they invented airplanes. Someone wanted to travel easily so automobiles and trains were made. But, those things were created by people who possessed special talents. Only a genius can convert those imaginings into reality. We ordinary mortals should just live our lives fully. We shouldn't act impulsively just because we feel adventurous."

"Shut up."

Haruhi just cut off my rather excellent speech, or at least that's what I think, and turned her head the other direction. Looks like she's really moody right now. But then again, when isn't she? I am used to it already.

This girl probably doesn't care about anything— unless it involves supernatural powers that far surpasses reality. The world doesn't have those, however. Nope, really.

Long live the Laws of Physics! Thanks to you we humans can live in peace. Though Haruhi may cringe at this.

I am normal, right?

Something must have triggered it.

Maybe it's the above conversation?

Because I never saw it coming!

The warm sun made everyone in the classroom sleepy. Just as I was nodding my head and going to sleep, a powerful force suddenly exerted itself on my collar and pulled me backwards. Because the force was so strong, my head hit the corner of the desk behind me. Tears instantly came out of my eyes.

"What do you think you are doing!?"

I turned my head around madly and saw Haruhi, one hand still grabbing my collar, smiling a big smile that was as bright as the tropical sun— honestly, this is the first time I've seen her smile! If smiles can be measured in terms of temperature, then her smile was as hot as a tropical rain forest.

"I got it!"

Hey, don't spit on me!

"Why didn't I think of this before?"

Haruhi's eyes shone as brightly as the Albireo Alpha star
. She stared at me pointedly. Reluctantly I asked:

"What did you think up?"

"If it doesn't exist, I can just create one myself!"

"Create what?"

"A club!"

My head suddenly hurt and I don't think it had anything to do with my head hitting the desk a moment ago.

"Really? What an excellent idea. Can you let go of me now?"

"What's with your attitude? You should be happier!"

"About your idea, I'll talk to you about that later. For now I just want you to consider where we are, THEN you can share your joy with me. But first calm down okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"Class is still in session."

Haruhi finally let go of my collar. I pressed the numbing back of my head and turned around slowly. I noticed that the whole class looked totally awestruck. The freshly-graduated newbie English teacher, with her chalk in her hand, stared at me and looked as if she was ready to cry.

I signaled Haruhi to sit down quickly and shrugged towards the poor teacher.

Please continue with the lesson.

I heard Haruhi mumble about something and sat down unwillingly. The teacher then resumed her writing on the board...

Create a new club?

Hmmmm...

Don't tell me I'm already a member?

My aching cerebrum just serves to enhance my unease.